Bomb

By my senior year I thought I had a handle on my sleeping disorders. I knew my triggers, I was managing my stress, and my family knew how to respond to my night terrors.  Although it was annoying, I thought I pretty much had my night terrors figured out. Then I was contacted by Brad Silvey.

Brad Silvey was and currently is the head coach of the Women's Soccer Team at Iowa Western Community College. I got a call from him shortly after my senior season soccer ended. (Around October 2009) Brad explained that he was traveling through the state of Utah putting on soccer camps for potential future players. He asked me to attend the camp in St. George and it would be a try out of sorts for his college team. You can imagine my excitement when I hung up the phone. I loved playing high school soccer but I never dreamed that a college team would be interested in me. Even though the try out wasn't until January, I thought about it every single day. At first I only felt excitement when I thought about the try out. As time went on I started to get nervous and really stress out. This try out could potentially change my life.

By now you probably know where this is heading. Before I get into the "Bomb" incident, I want to explain my living situation. This incident occurred somewhere between late October and early November of 2009. My older sisters were married and out of the house. The only remaining children were my younger brother Eric, my older brother Marty, and myself. All of us kids slept down in the basement and my parents slept upstairs by themselves. Eric has always been a very heavy sleeper so he was never affected by my night terrors. Marty however could always hear me. He got very used to my routine freak outs. He would usually wake up to my yells/screams and wait for me to calm back down. Occasionally  I wouldn't stop and he would come in to calm me down. Other times I would run out into the hall and he would listen for my footsteps to return to my bedroom. We pretty much had a system, but we weren't prepared for the bomb.

I can see my house. I must be floating in the air because I am looking at the front of it, but I can also see the top of the roof. I know I'm inside sleeping. I can feel it. It's really dark and quiet. It's way too quiet. Something's not right. I hear a tiny ringing. That's when I see it. A giant black bomb. It looks exactly like a bomb you would see in a cartoon. It is suspended above my house. It's just hanging there. Why is it there? O my gosh it's been lit! And now it's falling! I've got to get myself out before the house blows up.

 

Suddenly I am back in my bedroom. I shoot out of bed. I know I need to get out of the house and fast. I haven't forgotten that there is a bomb about to drop right on top of me. I whip open my door and sprint up the stairs. I open the lock in record speed. Thank goodness I've undone this lock so many times. I am running down the porch steps in no time. Although I have only a large T-shirt and panties on and I'm barefoot, I feel nothing. My adrenaline is on full power. I am running like I never have before. I'm pretty sure I'm experiencing what they call the Flight or Fight response. And man am I flying! It's like my entire body is being propelled forward with lightening speed. As I sprint down the sidewalk I notice the other houses are dark and silent. Don't they know what's about to happen? Why am I the only one running? Wait... I'm alone. I LEFT ERIC IN THE HOUSE! I have to get back there and save him! I whip around and start sprinting back to the house. I'm running out of time! I don't know if I can get him out of there in time. I can't believe I left him. He has no idea that the bomb is about to drop. He's still fast asleep. I have to get in there! I am back in the driveway. In a few steps I'll be ..

****************************BECCA!!!!********************************

 

I'm staring at Marty. He has met me in the driveway. I look past him and see my mom standing on the porch. Wait... what are they doing here? Did I? No... Did I really run outside? I stand there for a few seconds. I try to comprehend what just happened. Marty leads me back inside. We all three stand in the entry way. We are all pretty shocked that I actually made it outside. After the initial shock wears off we realize the whole thing is pretty funny. I ran down the street half asleep in my underwear. What else was there left to do but laugh?

 

After that night we realized that my night terrors weren't as simple as we thought. I myself realized that I was worrying too much about the try out. I'm happy to say that come January I rocked the try out. I was offered a scholarship at IWCC and was ready to move to Iowa in the summer. I left for college ready for a whole new world.

 

I should have known my night terrors would follow me.



Triggers

As the years went on I began to recognize that I had certain triggers for my sleeping disorders. For example, if I was more stressed than usual or had a big event coming up, my night terrors would become more frequent and intense. If I was lacking in sleep I would wake up yelling. If I took afternoon naps I would experience Sleep Paralysis. There were (and still are) many triggers, but I think the most annoying trigger was sleeping in an unfamiliar environment

For years I couldn't handle sleeping in hotel rooms. I would undoubtedly sleep walk around each one. If you ask my older sisters about our trip to Cancun in 2003, they can testify that I tried to escape our room almost every night in my sleep. Although I hardly remember freaking out in the Cancun hotel room, I do have many memories from other hotel rooms. I have a very distinct memory of my waking up in a hotel room in California. I was probably about age 13 and I was sharing a bed with my mother. I awoke because my mom had yelled, "I hate that you do this!" and it had jolted me back to consciousness. I was standing across the room and from the look on my mom's face I could tell that it had been a rough night so far. I still don't know how many times I got up and slept walked that night. It's still a touchy subject when I bring it up to my mom.

Sleeping over at a friend's house is another story entirely. I used to have to warn my friend's families that I might start randomly screaming in the middle of the night. Luckily by the time I was 12 I had a core group of friends that I spent the night with. They became used to my sleep walking and talking and took it all in stride. In fact in the beginning they thought it was hilarious and couldn't get enough. As the years went by, they figured out how to easily talk me into going back to bed once I started sleep walking.

Now that I'm older (22, so old) I am better at recognizing my triggers and trying to minimize my incidents. I wish I could say I have it all figured out but I don't. Even though I know I will experience Sleep Paralysis, I still indulge in afternoon naps. I try to manage my stress, but sometimes I let it get the best of me, even though I know it will result in night terrors. I know it sounds risky to take afternoon naps and that I'm living on the edge, but hey, I am a 22 year old after all!